1 Corinthians 13:4-13
"Love is patient, love is kind. it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.For now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
Love is something that many take for granted. Also, many do not understand or able to put into practice correctly. We learn to love from watching others. The environment we grow up in often is the teacher for how we practice. Some grew up in homes where their parents were the perfect example of love (if there is one). Others grew up in homes where love was not shown in many ways but talked about. It's hard to put into practice what we are told, but much easier to do when it is showed.
We are all products of the environment that we were raised in. There is a specific family who will go unamed, who recently approached my wife and asked her not to let our daughter hug their five year old girl, or tell her she loves her. This parent said they do not show affection to their kids nor to eachother in front of their children. They have a six month old baby boy and I have never seen them give him kisses or hug him as most would be doing. I never realized it until my wife told me of the converstation. This parent said that their kids will only get those things from their spouce.
Now, I am not one to judge but since finding this out I see why it is hard for these kids to make friends and even communicate with other kids on a level that draws young people to them. They do not play normal and showing affection is foreign to them as they get none shown to them in the home.
I am however a firm believer that whle your environment can teach you how not to implement correct love and show it in a way that will make anyone feel appreciated, one can change when they see they have not been taught right. I am, for a better word, a tradition braker. While my parents were loving toward us they rarely showed affection to each other which is something children need to see to learn. My pops was not huggy and I only remember him telling me "I love you," twice growing up (until I got into College). My momma did a good job of hugging us and telling us she loved us. So I had half of the example. But after I got married I saw first hand that while I hated not seeing it and vowed I woudl be different, I became for years what I dispised. Sometimes I showed little affection without knowing it. It was not second nature to me.
Now of course it's a different story. I can't wait to love on my wife and kids. I did good all along about showing love to my two beautiful girls but left my wife "out in the cold" often times without realizing it. It took me almost seven years to realize what I was doing. When I did, I was ashamed and hearbroken. I now don't need to make an effort to show her love and effection. It just happens. It has become second nature.
Love is a very powerful gift. The love we are suppose to show and do show are often two completely different things. I think it's time we, as they say, "be the change we want to see."
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
When I write about my life and thoughts, I can't help but write about my wife and kids. I am married to the most beautiful woman in the world. She is my best friend and love of my life. I fall deeper in love with her every day. My prayer is that she will continue to grow deeply in love with me. My girls are the light of my life. My wife and girls inspire me to better than I am. I love you Adrienne, Gabby, and Gracie
Friday, October 29, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
wind blown
Ever stand in a wind and fall back knowing without a doubt that it will hold you up? Somthing like the scene in Brother bear where Koda and Keni are stading at the top of a hill and are blown up until the wind stops and they fall...
As usualy i got up this am and got ready for work with my eyes half closed. I was blessed to roll over at the sound of my alarm and see that neither of my girls were in our bed and then realized that neither myself or my wife had to get up during the night to calm them or get them back to sleep.
I got my clothes with the light of my cell to keep the burning sensation from hitting my eyes when turning on the light. Got dressed deoderized, teeth brushed, and kissed the wife as I headed out the door.
I opened the door expecting snow on the grownd and was let down when there was no fluffly white stuff laying out. Then the wind hit me in the face sending cold chills down my spine. Talk about waking up immediately. It was like having someone come in and throw a ice cold glass of water over you as you sleep warm in the bed. I put on my Chicago Bears stocking hat and got in the "on-call" car. Driving to work the wind was blowing hard enough to rock the massive hunk of metal I was driving. I got out to hear the ocean in a fit of crashing waves thrown by the wind. I had thoughts of allowing myself to fall back and let the wind hold me up, but knowing I could crash to the cold grownd and still not fully awake I covered up hard and ran into the building...
If it were warmer I would have enjoyed the wind blowing. Life is like that sometimes. The wind blows hard and some wind is nicer than others. Those nice hard windy days in life make you want to slow down and just let it slap you in the face and blow your hair around (if you have hair!). But, what of the days with a hard bad wind? The wind of missing family who have been gone or are a good distance away? Those winds we want to allow to blow away quickly...
So today my hope is that you have the good wind that makes you pause!
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
As usualy i got up this am and got ready for work with my eyes half closed. I was blessed to roll over at the sound of my alarm and see that neither of my girls were in our bed and then realized that neither myself or my wife had to get up during the night to calm them or get them back to sleep.
I got my clothes with the light of my cell to keep the burning sensation from hitting my eyes when turning on the light. Got dressed deoderized, teeth brushed, and kissed the wife as I headed out the door.
I opened the door expecting snow on the grownd and was let down when there was no fluffly white stuff laying out. Then the wind hit me in the face sending cold chills down my spine. Talk about waking up immediately. It was like having someone come in and throw a ice cold glass of water over you as you sleep warm in the bed. I put on my Chicago Bears stocking hat and got in the "on-call" car. Driving to work the wind was blowing hard enough to rock the massive hunk of metal I was driving. I got out to hear the ocean in a fit of crashing waves thrown by the wind. I had thoughts of allowing myself to fall back and let the wind hold me up, but knowing I could crash to the cold grownd and still not fully awake I covered up hard and ran into the building...
If it were warmer I would have enjoyed the wind blowing. Life is like that sometimes. The wind blows hard and some wind is nicer than others. Those nice hard windy days in life make you want to slow down and just let it slap you in the face and blow your hair around (if you have hair!). But, what of the days with a hard bad wind? The wind of missing family who have been gone or are a good distance away? Those winds we want to allow to blow away quickly...
So today my hope is that you have the good wind that makes you pause!
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
Monday, October 25, 2010
Loose your mind
"When you lose your mind, you will come to your senses."
(Dan Millman, Way of The Peacefull Warriror)
Our minds are controling and can keep us from the goals, dreams, and successes we have planned in the future. Thoughts creep in at times without warning that send us down a thought path that we can't always control. Before long the precious moments we have are gone never to be regained. The mind is powerful and yet fragile. It is far to easey to get caught up in our thoughts. Deep thinking isn't a bad thing when it causes us to evaluate who are and re-evaluate who we were, opening the door for change.
To many times we see the world from the viewpoint of our own personal cravings. I have been told what comes out of the mouth is a miror to what's in the heart. Our minds on the other hand are linked to both the heart and the random nothingness that can distract us from the importance of the moment and the future.
Think about it! How often do you have negative thoughts that get in the way of your time? If you could take some time to write down every thought that was counter productive and negative in general, I would be willing to bet you would fill a journal within a week. Thoughts of the mind are hard to control. These thoughts can lead to many emotions. For example: The thought of a loved one and the recent passing lead to the emotions of pain and remourse. The thought of someone who disrespected you or a fight with your spouse lead to the emotions of anger and being ashamed. Our thoughts are a powerful link to our emotions. Our emotions can take us away and before we know it time has shifted and nothing is accomplished.
In my job it is important for me to make the best use of my time. Prioritizing is important. The moments add up. Wasting time is frustrating when things don't get done. When I have to wait for programs and files to load and the internet to move quicker than it does in real time, I get frustrated quickly because those minutes and moments are gone forever. I can't get those back!
The same is true for our thoughts. In many ways I consider those random thoughts that are at times hard to control as trah in my mind. They serve not purpose other than to distract us. I am someone who see everything and hears almost everything. I get distracted easily. This is shy I tell my youth that their cell phones have to be on silent or off while we are in service. This is also why I close my door through the day.
When I give real effort into clearing the trash out of my mind and focussing on the tasks at hand, I am amazed at how much I get accomplished.
Time to clear the trash!
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
Friday, October 22, 2010
Finishing
I have been thinking a lot lately about "finishing."
When I was in high shool I played on our school's football team that was said to have a very bad year because of our lack of size and ability. We went into the season with a chip on our shoulder. Prior to any games our own sports writer was saying he saw a dismasal season approaching for the Bulldogs.
Something that defines a great team is the their ability to finish. A team can play a great game and overpower their apponent but not finish and end up losing the game. Something that we did well as the "underdog's" in high school was finishing. Going in with a chip on our shoulder to "prove everyone wrong" and be able to use what we knew we had. We were fast, angry, strong, and far better than the credit we were given. The fact that we finished well set the tone for a history of winning and further undefeated seasons with many appearances in the state playoffs not to metion a span of ten straight years as being District and Conference Champions.
In College I was part of a team for the first three years who would dominate most every game but did not finish. It takes the hole team to finish the game and have a "W." The same is with the NFL. My favorite team tends to start slow and finish well (exept in two losses this season).
The same is true in life. I have wanted to leave things unfinished. I have wanted to walk off the job that has been a great blessing in my life because of two bad days. I finish most everything I start. I am someone who was raised to not quit anything. In fact, the only time I have quit anything in my life I regret because I was young and immature and allowed my anger to control me.
The ability to finish gives us the ability for the most success. Finishing is the a powerful tool if used correctly. Being ruled by our thoughts and emotions only sets us back and allows us to justify quitting and not finishing. I have to make a real effort to tell myself to finish when things get hard. What is the over all goal? What do I need to do to meet my responsibilities? How do I provide for my wife and kids, what example am I setting?
I want my children and the youth I serve in work and in ministry to see a man who finishes no matter how hard things get.
Are you finishing?
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
When I was in high shool I played on our school's football team that was said to have a very bad year because of our lack of size and ability. We went into the season with a chip on our shoulder. Prior to any games our own sports writer was saying he saw a dismasal season approaching for the Bulldogs.
Something that defines a great team is the their ability to finish. A team can play a great game and overpower their apponent but not finish and end up losing the game. Something that we did well as the "underdog's" in high school was finishing. Going in with a chip on our shoulder to "prove everyone wrong" and be able to use what we knew we had. We were fast, angry, strong, and far better than the credit we were given. The fact that we finished well set the tone for a history of winning and further undefeated seasons with many appearances in the state playoffs not to metion a span of ten straight years as being District and Conference Champions.
In College I was part of a team for the first three years who would dominate most every game but did not finish. It takes the hole team to finish the game and have a "W." The same is with the NFL. My favorite team tends to start slow and finish well (exept in two losses this season).
The same is true in life. I have wanted to leave things unfinished. I have wanted to walk off the job that has been a great blessing in my life because of two bad days. I finish most everything I start. I am someone who was raised to not quit anything. In fact, the only time I have quit anything in my life I regret because I was young and immature and allowed my anger to control me.
The ability to finish gives us the ability for the most success. Finishing is the a powerful tool if used correctly. Being ruled by our thoughts and emotions only sets us back and allows us to justify quitting and not finishing. I have to make a real effort to tell myself to finish when things get hard. What is the over all goal? What do I need to do to meet my responsibilities? How do I provide for my wife and kids, what example am I setting?
I want my children and the youth I serve in work and in ministry to see a man who finishes no matter how hard things get.
Are you finishing?
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Travel Good and Bad
Travel is sometimes both good and bad. I have to travel at least once a month for work... Today I fly out for a day trip to Elim. It won't be long and a day trip can turn into a two day trip if the weather is bad.
There are definate goods and bads. What I consider good is this: I get to see the beauty of Alaska by air and the beauty of another village. I get to help out some kids and meet new people from another place. But, they say that distance makes the heart grow fonder. And, it's this that is a two edged knife. I believe this... Because, while I am gone I miss my family very much. I miss my wife knowing I am only a walk away if she needs me and that I get to see her and the kids when I get off work.
So, this leads me to the bad... Last time the engines went off midflight. There is always the possiblity of the plane going down. This year so far in Alaska there have been reported more than eight planes going down, from large props to small planes. At least five were major news worthy events. Then there is the other edge to the saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder." That part of the edge cuts and hurts. When your marriage is doing good and where it should be with growth you want to be around tha person as much as possible. Your heart doesn't like the sepparation and pain is involved. I get this feeling when I am gone. Like the other half of me is incomplete. As dumb as it sounds, right now, I feel like at times we are dating again. What a great feeling.
Travel is both good and bad... But, it does open possiblities for blessing not to mention a brake from cell phones and the office. It's just to bad that the work piles up while I'm gone!
So, word for today: "Enjoy"
Enjoy what life has to offer. The trips, the ups and downs, the time away from it all, the warm baths or hot showers, the hand holding, or even holding your kids when they are sick (as both of mine are now.)
Enjoy!!!
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
There are definate goods and bads. What I consider good is this: I get to see the beauty of Alaska by air and the beauty of another village. I get to help out some kids and meet new people from another place. But, they say that distance makes the heart grow fonder. And, it's this that is a two edged knife. I believe this... Because, while I am gone I miss my family very much. I miss my wife knowing I am only a walk away if she needs me and that I get to see her and the kids when I get off work.
So, this leads me to the bad... Last time the engines went off midflight. There is always the possiblity of the plane going down. This year so far in Alaska there have been reported more than eight planes going down, from large props to small planes. At least five were major news worthy events. Then there is the other edge to the saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder." That part of the edge cuts and hurts. When your marriage is doing good and where it should be with growth you want to be around tha person as much as possible. Your heart doesn't like the sepparation and pain is involved. I get this feeling when I am gone. Like the other half of me is incomplete. As dumb as it sounds, right now, I feel like at times we are dating again. What a great feeling.
Travel is both good and bad... But, it does open possiblities for blessing not to mention a brake from cell phones and the office. It's just to bad that the work piles up while I'm gone!
So, word for today: "Enjoy"
Enjoy what life has to offer. The trips, the ups and downs, the time away from it all, the warm baths or hot showers, the hand holding, or even holding your kids when they are sick (as both of mine are now.)
Enjoy!!!
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Giving up
Have you ever just wanted to give up? You just get tired of all the crap of the job and life... My life is more than pretty good outside the doors of my job that pays the bills. I have a stunningly beautiful wife and angels for children.
For the most part I enjoy my job, because I get to help kids. Even when they lash out at me (which they have the right to do with someone) I am helping them be safe and trying to re-unite them with their families. But, when people who are not really part of the case throw out their opinions and wild accusations my way, that is when I get unhappy and want to revert to the former Mike who wants to take a bite out of their life and make them misserable with the most powerful life giving and taking thing available, my tongue!
I am amazed at peoples ability to tare down others and not even batt an eye then turn around and whine and complain when it is done to them. I sit back and listen to this mess of self-causing crap and roll my eyes and want to tell them to grow up "you reap what you sow, if you sow discord and harm, that is what you will reap."
So, here's the lesson for today.... Don't ruin a day or a life for the moment if you don't want your ruined. Not everyone deserves to be treated poorly. If you are one of those people, here's my advice: Check yourself... Ask yourself, "Would I want someone in my face or sending me nasty e-mails? Maybe I should verify the facts before spouting the poison that can ruin a day of someone who does not deserve it."
Blessings,
Mike III
For the most part I enjoy my job, because I get to help kids. Even when they lash out at me (which they have the right to do with someone) I am helping them be safe and trying to re-unite them with their families. But, when people who are not really part of the case throw out their opinions and wild accusations my way, that is when I get unhappy and want to revert to the former Mike who wants to take a bite out of their life and make them misserable with the most powerful life giving and taking thing available, my tongue!
I am amazed at peoples ability to tare down others and not even batt an eye then turn around and whine and complain when it is done to them. I sit back and listen to this mess of self-causing crap and roll my eyes and want to tell them to grow up "you reap what you sow, if you sow discord and harm, that is what you will reap."
So, here's the lesson for today.... Don't ruin a day or a life for the moment if you don't want your ruined. Not everyone deserves to be treated poorly. If you are one of those people, here's my advice: Check yourself... Ask yourself, "Would I want someone in my face or sending me nasty e-mails? Maybe I should verify the facts before spouting the poison that can ruin a day of someone who does not deserve it."
Blessings,
Mike III
Friday, October 15, 2010
Two Stars
TWO STARS:
Stars fill the night sky bringing light that shines...
When two hearts bind together,
that light is ignited forever.
One star never shines as bright without the others combined.
Our girls were born of two stars,
who are bound,
and only shine when together...
You have sparked the light in me.
You have given me reason to be,
the Man God wants me to be...
Let us hold on to one another tight.
Embracing all the light...
God gave me you,
my one and only,
my ALWAYS AND FOREVER!!
I love you babe (Adrienne McTear Christian)
Mike III (AKA: Big Daddy)
Thursday, October 14, 2010
CLICK
Maybe this should be titled "hit the pause button" or "slow motion." Either way "Click" is good enough.
Not all that long ago Adam Sandler was in a semi popular movie called "CLICK." It didn't do all that well in the box office but the profit would have been something we poorer people would have been able to get out of debt with. Maybe it was the thought behind the movie that brought it "some" attention. The story line wasn't all that great and the overall plot and acting wasn't even something remotely inspiring. But having a majic remote control for life! That is a worth while thought.
Being able to slow things down, fast forward through certain parts or skip them alltogether, would be in some cases a blessing. Given of course the thing didn't screw up like in the movie. There was this one scene where Adam hit the "pause" button. Slapped his boss in the face, jumped up on the desk and ripped a juicy nast fart right in his nose. Then he hit "play." I found this wildly funny. How many of us would have liked to do that very thing?
What about pausing in life? What about hitting that mental pause button where everything else in life that really and truely doesn't have meaning and enjoying everthing that does?! Seems my blogs of late are a lot on life and slowing down. But the older my kid get and every year there is an aniversary of my marriage that comes and goes, I realize the importance of hitting that mental "pause" button on life. All the e-mails that should be in our "junk folder", all the serfing of the web, the countless hours that add up from texting and talking on the phone, not to mention the waste of time by sitting in front of the TV and shoveling the crazy amounts of unhealthy food into our yap's...
Why not do something without those distractions? Leave the cell phone off, let the screene on the TV stay black, shut down the computer and disable the internet, un plug the phone, toss the keys to the car and office in it's place and do something a little more worth while. Like, spend time with your kids (or family if you have no kids of your own). Play a board game (which I will admit I do not enjoy all that much), build a house of cards and for the very purpose of bringing joy to the kids as they destroy it. Build them a massive tent or cardboard box mansion. When we lived in Skagway, we had a one bedroom overpriced apartment with no extra money for cable or satelite. So TV was on much less. Before I worked my four jobs that I quickly acquired after my wife got pregnant with our second child, I found ways to do crazy things with Gabby, while mommy was away at work. Sure, we took semi long walks, until of course she was to tired and daddy had to carrry her for the countless blocks back to the house or around town. But every now and again on a Sunday or just for fun I would do Gabby's hair (what little she had). Gabby didn't have much hair at all for the first two years of her life, so we did very little with it. But daddy being the creative geneius he is, would do her hair up for all the world to see. She wasn't embarrassed. She loved it. One Sunday morning I took her into the bathroom while mommy got ready for church. I sat her up on the counter and grabbyed my mouse. Squeezing more than i needed into my hand to be sure the little bit of hair I had to work with on her head would be rock hard, I skulped a masterpiece pointed mowhawk. Spikes pointed razor sharp in the middle of her head some much higher than others made me smile, and when I turned her around to look in the mirror her little giggles rang through our apartment causing mommy to come running. Luckily my wife was not mad but laughed and rolled her eyes.
See, I hit the pause button on the rest of life to have a little bit of fun that created a memory to write her and bring a smile to my face as I clicked away at the keys. Aren't we suppose to enjoy life for what it's worth?
Do yourself a favor, HIT THE PAUSE BUTTON ON LIFE. Everything will be there when you push play again.
Blessings,
Mike III
Not all that long ago Adam Sandler was in a semi popular movie called "CLICK." It didn't do all that well in the box office but the profit would have been something we poorer people would have been able to get out of debt with. Maybe it was the thought behind the movie that brought it "some" attention. The story line wasn't all that great and the overall plot and acting wasn't even something remotely inspiring. But having a majic remote control for life! That is a worth while thought.
Being able to slow things down, fast forward through certain parts or skip them alltogether, would be in some cases a blessing. Given of course the thing didn't screw up like in the movie. There was this one scene where Adam hit the "pause" button. Slapped his boss in the face, jumped up on the desk and ripped a juicy nast fart right in his nose. Then he hit "play." I found this wildly funny. How many of us would have liked to do that very thing?
What about pausing in life? What about hitting that mental pause button where everything else in life that really and truely doesn't have meaning and enjoying everthing that does?! Seems my blogs of late are a lot on life and slowing down. But the older my kid get and every year there is an aniversary of my marriage that comes and goes, I realize the importance of hitting that mental "pause" button on life. All the e-mails that should be in our "junk folder", all the serfing of the web, the countless hours that add up from texting and talking on the phone, not to mention the waste of time by sitting in front of the TV and shoveling the crazy amounts of unhealthy food into our yap's...
Why not do something without those distractions? Leave the cell phone off, let the screene on the TV stay black, shut down the computer and disable the internet, un plug the phone, toss the keys to the car and office in it's place and do something a little more worth while. Like, spend time with your kids (or family if you have no kids of your own). Play a board game (which I will admit I do not enjoy all that much), build a house of cards and for the very purpose of bringing joy to the kids as they destroy it. Build them a massive tent or cardboard box mansion. When we lived in Skagway, we had a one bedroom overpriced apartment with no extra money for cable or satelite. So TV was on much less. Before I worked my four jobs that I quickly acquired after my wife got pregnant with our second child, I found ways to do crazy things with Gabby, while mommy was away at work. Sure, we took semi long walks, until of course she was to tired and daddy had to carrry her for the countless blocks back to the house or around town. But every now and again on a Sunday or just for fun I would do Gabby's hair (what little she had). Gabby didn't have much hair at all for the first two years of her life, so we did very little with it. But daddy being the creative geneius he is, would do her hair up for all the world to see. She wasn't embarrassed. She loved it. One Sunday morning I took her into the bathroom while mommy got ready for church. I sat her up on the counter and grabbyed my mouse. Squeezing more than i needed into my hand to be sure the little bit of hair I had to work with on her head would be rock hard, I skulped a masterpiece pointed mowhawk. Spikes pointed razor sharp in the middle of her head some much higher than others made me smile, and when I turned her around to look in the mirror her little giggles rang through our apartment causing mommy to come running. Luckily my wife was not mad but laughed and rolled her eyes.
See, I hit the pause button on the rest of life to have a little bit of fun that created a memory to write her and bring a smile to my face as I clicked away at the keys. Aren't we suppose to enjoy life for what it's worth?
Do yourself a favor, HIT THE PAUSE BUTTON ON LIFE. Everything will be there when you push play again.
Blessings,
Mike III
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Pane Daddy "Daddy's Pane"
"Pane Daddy, Daddy's Pane!" This is what I hear from my youngest Gracie, every time a plane fly's over head or she sees a plane on any given TV show. When I was gone to my total of 4 weeks of training apparently one day driving by the airport my youngest was smart enough to understand that Daddy left on a plane and would be back soon on a plane.
So now, every time there is a plane in her view she says the above statement. She gets excited and points her small chubby digit in the dirction of the "pane." Daddy smiles and says, "yes baby plain."
Our children are aware of everything around them. They are sensative in ways that suprise us and even more suprising is their ability to process this information and verbalize it when we least expecct it. Both of my children do this.
Recently the final barge for the season arrived with our Container containing our things that have been in storage for a year. In the items stored were various things we decided not to sell off. Some of the girls toys, family photo albums, my bike (which I am itching to ride again), and massive amounts of books boxed up (both mine and pop's).
As we brought in a good percentage of the things that cluttered the house (and still does) i pulled out various photo albums and flipped through the pictures for my girls to look at. It was like Christmas morning for them all over again. New toys and things to fiddle with. I was sitting with Gracie looking at some of these photos when we came to page from when Gabby was her age in Skagway. Gracie pointed that chubby little diggit and touched the page saying "Gaaee" which translates to Gabby. She recognized the younger version of her sister. Gabby heard her and ran over taking her attention to all the reunited toys and clothing from that past and visited the memories with me and her little sister. I watched as a smile broke and my girls carried on their conversation, Gabby narrating to her baby sister where and when the picture was taken.
An unexpected and suprising thought hit me as we looked at these pictures. It wasn't all that long ago that Gabby spoke in borken sentances and pointed an equally chubby digget at things she saw. I had forgotten the bond that I had with Gabby when she was that age. From birth my oldest and I had a very strong bond. She was a daddy's girl. While this is still true to a degree there are times I felt that bond has been replaced with a bond with her Paupo. But the reminder of our bond helped me to realize that my little girls love me very much. They shared a moment with daddy. They brought me joy and of course a small tear welled up that I quickly wiped away before it could run it's course down my cheek.
I looked up noticing someone was watching us. It was my wife with a smile across her face. I realized something more. My life is complete with the blessing that I have three girls in my life that I love very much and who love me in return. At that moment all the years of prayer that God would fill my lonliness and replace it the love of a family of my own, was now my reality. Over this past year I have learned to take the moments and hold on. But, it doesn't change the fact that when we hear our children say things that cause us to smile and shock us, are a reminder that time is short. Gracie will never be the age she is now again. Gabby is not two anymore and won't be four for long. The same is true for my neices and nephews. I have held and changed countless diapers of most of them. Now, my oldest niece (Emmy) is soo tall and much older. She's bright and beautiful. Many times I went out of my way traveling hours to where ever they were living to visit her. Time is short.
Embrace "Pane Daddy, Daddy's Pane" moments and don't let them go. They won't be around all that long.
Blessings,
Mike III
So now, every time there is a plane in her view she says the above statement. She gets excited and points her small chubby digit in the dirction of the "pane." Daddy smiles and says, "yes baby plain."
Our children are aware of everything around them. They are sensative in ways that suprise us and even more suprising is their ability to process this information and verbalize it when we least expecct it. Both of my children do this.
Recently the final barge for the season arrived with our Container containing our things that have been in storage for a year. In the items stored were various things we decided not to sell off. Some of the girls toys, family photo albums, my bike (which I am itching to ride again), and massive amounts of books boxed up (both mine and pop's).
As we brought in a good percentage of the things that cluttered the house (and still does) i pulled out various photo albums and flipped through the pictures for my girls to look at. It was like Christmas morning for them all over again. New toys and things to fiddle with. I was sitting with Gracie looking at some of these photos when we came to page from when Gabby was her age in Skagway. Gracie pointed that chubby little diggit and touched the page saying "Gaaee" which translates to Gabby. She recognized the younger version of her sister. Gabby heard her and ran over taking her attention to all the reunited toys and clothing from that past and visited the memories with me and her little sister. I watched as a smile broke and my girls carried on their conversation, Gabby narrating to her baby sister where and when the picture was taken.
An unexpected and suprising thought hit me as we looked at these pictures. It wasn't all that long ago that Gabby spoke in borken sentances and pointed an equally chubby digget at things she saw. I had forgotten the bond that I had with Gabby when she was that age. From birth my oldest and I had a very strong bond. She was a daddy's girl. While this is still true to a degree there are times I felt that bond has been replaced with a bond with her Paupo. But the reminder of our bond helped me to realize that my little girls love me very much. They shared a moment with daddy. They brought me joy and of course a small tear welled up that I quickly wiped away before it could run it's course down my cheek.
I looked up noticing someone was watching us. It was my wife with a smile across her face. I realized something more. My life is complete with the blessing that I have three girls in my life that I love very much and who love me in return. At that moment all the years of prayer that God would fill my lonliness and replace it the love of a family of my own, was now my reality. Over this past year I have learned to take the moments and hold on. But, it doesn't change the fact that when we hear our children say things that cause us to smile and shock us, are a reminder that time is short. Gracie will never be the age she is now again. Gabby is not two anymore and won't be four for long. The same is true for my neices and nephews. I have held and changed countless diapers of most of them. Now, my oldest niece (Emmy) is soo tall and much older. She's bright and beautiful. Many times I went out of my way traveling hours to where ever they were living to visit her. Time is short.
Embrace "Pane Daddy, Daddy's Pane" moments and don't let them go. They won't be around all that long.
Blessings,
Mike III
Monday, October 4, 2010
Devoted
Being "devoted" can mean a lot of things. Devotion is something that is meant to help us take flight. But, devotion to the wrong things clips the wings of flight and keeps us on the ground.
Working with troubled youth that have been removed from the home for what ever reason I see how clipped wings prevents growth and over all healing.
How many of us have been scarred by the events of the past? How many of us really knows what it feels like to have PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder)? Our soldiers know it all to well. They go off complete and whole willing to fight for our freedoms we take for granted, and come back broken and a shadow of their former self. They become strangers to their wives and children as they fight to regain control of life.
Children are fragile. They are products of their parents. When parents abuse the God given right to protect their children and harm them in any number of ways, they brake the trust God gave them and do eternal damage. Once you have broken a childs trust and hurt them, it is NEVER regained. It's often very hard for me to separate the anger from compassion when I deal with these blessings given by God who have had their trust abused. It's easey for adults to write them off as a "bad seed." But the truth is, the adults in their lives have let them down. I want to be the one to punish them. I want to be the one who stands up and takes justice into my hands. I want to fight for them, sometimes in vengance. It hits to close to home for me. I spend so much time in prayer for them and how I deal with my own emotions.
In the end, I pray God will deal with those who hurt these wonderful kids in away that only He can. My heart breaks for them as I speak with them on the phone and visit them in person. What did they do to deserve it? They didn't ask to be born, to be left alone, to be abused, to be treated as trash...
I know if my heart is breaking for them God's heart is more than broken. As much as I love and serve God I ask Him why he sits by and lets it happen. Sure, their judgement will be harsh but how swift?
As I sit here clicking away at the keys, the prayer of my heart is that God would give me wisdom to say the right words, and be one of the adults who WILL NOT let them down.
Over the years as a Youth Pastor I have faught for me students. My approach has never been one of a "typical" Youth Pastor. Now, I consider myself a Youth Specialist. There is a reason why the majority of my students are from broken homes and broken themselves. God has opened a door in my life to be surrounded by the students who are hurting and need to be loved. So now, I specialize in reaching the unreachable and loving the unloved.
What are we doing for those children and teens who hurt so much they resort to replacing the hurt with so many things? Cutting, teen pregnancy, STD's, alcohol abuse, and suicide consume this generation as they cry out in the dark for hope. What are you and I doing? What can we say to Christ on the day of judgement?
My prayer is that God would allow us to be more determined to make a difference. For making a difference in one child's life could mean the difference between life and death...
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
Working with troubled youth that have been removed from the home for what ever reason I see how clipped wings prevents growth and over all healing.
How many of us have been scarred by the events of the past? How many of us really knows what it feels like to have PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder)? Our soldiers know it all to well. They go off complete and whole willing to fight for our freedoms we take for granted, and come back broken and a shadow of their former self. They become strangers to their wives and children as they fight to regain control of life.
Children are fragile. They are products of their parents. When parents abuse the God given right to protect their children and harm them in any number of ways, they brake the trust God gave them and do eternal damage. Once you have broken a childs trust and hurt them, it is NEVER regained. It's often very hard for me to separate the anger from compassion when I deal with these blessings given by God who have had their trust abused. It's easey for adults to write them off as a "bad seed." But the truth is, the adults in their lives have let them down. I want to be the one to punish them. I want to be the one who stands up and takes justice into my hands. I want to fight for them, sometimes in vengance. It hits to close to home for me. I spend so much time in prayer for them and how I deal with my own emotions.
In the end, I pray God will deal with those who hurt these wonderful kids in away that only He can. My heart breaks for them as I speak with them on the phone and visit them in person. What did they do to deserve it? They didn't ask to be born, to be left alone, to be abused, to be treated as trash...
I know if my heart is breaking for them God's heart is more than broken. As much as I love and serve God I ask Him why he sits by and lets it happen. Sure, their judgement will be harsh but how swift?
As I sit here clicking away at the keys, the prayer of my heart is that God would give me wisdom to say the right words, and be one of the adults who WILL NOT let them down.
Over the years as a Youth Pastor I have faught for me students. My approach has never been one of a "typical" Youth Pastor. Now, I consider myself a Youth Specialist. There is a reason why the majority of my students are from broken homes and broken themselves. God has opened a door in my life to be surrounded by the students who are hurting and need to be loved. So now, I specialize in reaching the unreachable and loving the unloved.
What are we doing for those children and teens who hurt so much they resort to replacing the hurt with so many things? Cutting, teen pregnancy, STD's, alcohol abuse, and suicide consume this generation as they cry out in the dark for hope. What are you and I doing? What can we say to Christ on the day of judgement?
My prayer is that God would allow us to be more determined to make a difference. For making a difference in one child's life could mean the difference between life and death...
Blessings,
Mike III AKA Big Daddy
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)